Some days are awesome, and some days are just freaking hard. And we need some tips and tools to be able to handle that. We can love the good times but we have to be able to embrace the bad times too. In this episode, I talk about what to do when you’re at your breaking point, and some techniques to help alleviate some of the stress.
If you’d rather listen instead of reading, check out the podcast version below! There’s also a video version on YouTube found below:
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Avoid that temptation to go to instant gratification. It's not gonna make you feel better...
Stress, breakdowns, tipping point: it’s a rabbit hole of negativity
Hey everybody! Miss Chelsea here. Today, I’m going to talk to you about what to do when you’re at your breaking point.
I have five tips of things that will hopefully help you get through, as they’re helping me.
I am at this point right now and so I thought, there’s no better time to write this. I’ve been working on some things to help me through it, and I’m hoping that they can help you too. So I wanted to write this one when I was in this type of moment.
How did I get to this point of absolutely being stressed and on the tipping point?
Right now, it’s it’s kind of a crazy time, because of course, everything in the in the world is happening with the pandemic and we’re still figuring out the safety measures and everything with our music school being opened. There’s stress already going on with that.
And then we also have our Broadway performance coming up and we’re trying to make the safest possible thing happen as well. We’re hoping that everything doesn’t have to shut down based upon all the vacations and all the traveling that’s happening right now because it’s during the summer. So I have a lot of anxiety about that in general.
Also, we’re business owners and so I have a lot of anxiety in general about the business, and keeping it up and running, and having fears about certain things.
It’s very different from a 9-to-5 job where you go to the office, and then you can come home and you don’t have to worry about it. Everything else is taken care of.
But being an entrepreneur and a small business owner, you can’t really do that. Every time I have the thoughts, I’m always thinking about the music school and making sure everything’s working okay, and just trying to have a cohesive program. And so that’s been stressful for me.
And then also Michael’s in this stage where he’s repeating the same thing over and over. And even if I would respond to it once, he’ll still keep repeating it until he gets what he wants, and if he doesn’t, he’ll keep repeating it and louder and louder and louder and yelling… And I can’t just ignore it.
© Big Sky Photography
And I try so hard. Or I’m trying to maybe work on something at the same time, and I’m getting really frustrated, and then Molly, I think she’s teething, and she’s more in pain. She’s not going down for her naps as well. So I’ll be starting in the middle of a project and then I’ll have to stop, because I have to go and calm her down because she’s screaming and everything.
So there’s just a lot going on, and I’ve been feeling at this point myself.
And so here are five tips. These things have been helpful for me, and hopefully they are helpful to you as well.
Five Tips to Get Out Your Breaking Point
Tip number one: Avoid instant gratification.
One of the first things that I want to do when I get really stressed is something instant, like eat something sweet. Binge eating or stress eating… all that kind of thing.
And it’s really hard because we have this overwhelming sense of emotion and sometimes we don’t want to feel it. So we go to other forms.
For some people, it could be alcohol. Some people, it could be all sorts of other things.
And so avoid that temptation to go to instant gratification. That’s just a big no.
Because it’s not going to make you feel better. Because if I think, “I’m going to eat a couple cookies,” and then how would I feel after? Crappy.
I mean, during it, you’re like, “Oh yeah, this is fine,” but then after, you’re like “I shouldn’t have done that,” Right?
So anything that’s going to make you feel worse? Nip that in the bud.
Tip number two: Remember your priorities.
So it’s very easy for us to get caught up in everyone else’s agendas, because sometimes, they’re kind of screaming at your face.
Especially being a small business owner. So many people are happy, but then you get that one email where someone’s complaining about something, and that’s the only thing that you can think about, and it really is stressful for you.
You might experience this online too, where you have a video and then a bunch of people are liking it, and then you have one person that says some kind of rude or nasty comment. And that’s all that you can think about. It’s one of those types of things.
But remembering your priorities and finding the balance. For me, I think “Okay, what’s the most important thing to me?” It’s my family, I love them.
© Big Sky Photography
And so if there’s some other form of attention-grabber that’s distracting me from that, I have to just say, “Okay, remember my priorities.” Or remember my goals for performing, or remember my goals for the music school. Or certain things that I care about with my students.
And I have to just bring myself back to say, “Okay, that does not deserve my attention right now. That nasty email that I got, does not deserve my attention. It needs to be reserved for my family.”
And I have to keep reminding myself what is it that I want the most out of life. What is the most important thing?
And if that thing doesn’t fit into this bubble? You have to push it aside, as hard as it is.
Tip number three: Dance! Music.
Okay, everybody knows this.
You have a certain playlist maybe, or a certain song that you love listening to, and then as soon as you hear it, you start to get in a better mood and you want to dance around the house.
You just feel like a million bucks, or you just feel so confident while you’re doing it. You’re just having a good time and you can be silly and dance.
So my suggestion is to make a playlist where you have these pieces of music and then you play it.
Music can affect your mood. Greatly.
So as you’re hearing these pieces, hopefully your mood will get better. It sounds so silly, but it’s something so simple that we can do.
Just before I wrote this actually, I was listening to some pieces of music.
I really like 80’s music as well. I love to clean the house to 80’s music and just kind of dance around as I do it… so that really helped me feel better before I started writing this.
Tip number four: Breathing.
I’m still working on it too, because it’s one of those things where you’re like, “Yes, I’m breathing, I’m breathing all the time!” But that’s not the only thing.
Breathing is different than like “breathing”. Deep breathing.
Taking the time to inhale, taking the time to exhale, focusing on the inhales and exhales alone.
That’s probably one of the hardest things in the world for me. I struggle with that so much but when I do focus on that, or I do a guided deep breathing, or you could do guided meditations there’s so many videos on YouTube, that also helps all right it just kind of… whew.
Everything just relaxes, a little bit. It really does help, okay?
Tip number five: Self-care.
Self-care: whatever that is for you.
So stepping away if you can, unplug everything if you can, go on a walk, meditate, go take a nap… Whatever it is that makes you feel better after you do it, do that.
I am teaching soon which always makes me feel better, so I’m looking forward to that.
But also right before I did this video, I also put myself together a little bit because if I was going to dress how I was feeling? I would be in pajamas and an oversized t-shirt and a messy bun right now and that’s how I would be feeling.
But I’m like “Okay, I want to feel how I’m dressing,” so I’m like okay! So I put myself together and already, I’m starting to feel a little bit better today.
So those are the five tips.
Number one: Avoid instant gratification.
Number two: Remember your priorities.
Number three: Make a playlist.
Number four: Breathing.
And number five: Self-care.
Hopefully that helps. Please please please let me know in the comments, what helps you when you feel stressed? What helps you when you feel at your breaking point? I would love to hear.
And I think we can all just be here helping each other get through this because as we’ve said before, we are all in this together.
So if you like it, please give me a thumbs up, and if you want to see more like this, please subscribe.
Thank you, thank you so much for reading, and I’ll see you later!